Thursday, October 22, 2009

Ewwww

Being a mom is fun.  All those jokes you told as a kid about throw up and poop you actually get to live now!  Yea, its great.

The baby is mobile.  Hes doing the army crawl.  Hes also a happy spitter (my spell check says this is not a real word, I beg to differ).  You know what you get when you combine the two? Spit up on your sons school work.  I bet thats the last time he sits on the floor to work.

Then...oh then the grossest thing happened.  Yea, more gross than curdled milk on school work.

My 2 yr old got his very first scab.  It covered his elbow at first and kinda shrunk throughout the week, but it was still the size of a dime today. The incidence that gave it to him was quite humorous, todays incident not so much. As I was dressing him I could feel the scab rip from the skin.  It sent shivers down my spine.  This wasn't gonna be pretty.  Ds felt it too, the look on his face was sheer terror.  He wouldn't let me look at it but I could see the scab was just hanging there.  I decided to leave it, figuring me ripping it off would cause a screaming fit.  I figured I would sneak up on him and take it off when he wasn't awares.  Cause you know that would be WAY less traumatic. The day progressed but I never got the chance.

Then my mother came for lunch.  First she tells me to leave it, till she sees it.  Then she wants to tear it off.  I'm serious folks, it was just hanging there.  Like a loose thread.  But it was a scab. Uugggghhhhh, even thinking about it now gives me the willies.  So now my brother is here and playing ensues.  I knew the inevitable was bound to happen.  I just hoped I could get to the scab before the baby did.  Yes, I really thought that.  And for the record, it probably wouldn't be the grossest thing one of my kids put in their mouth.  I did say WOULDN'T.  I'll spare you the details.

Well it wasn't long before I heard screaming.  From one kid, then two, then three.  Yup, it had happened.  So its time to hunt for the scab.  Dirty Jobs ain't got nothin' on me! I asked my oldest son where they were playing.  Ok, On the sofa.  Yea...THAT sofa.  Thankfully my brother spotted it, standing about 5 feet from the sofa and holding a gun for an electronic game he points to it, careful not to touch it.  The wimp.  I picked it up, bare fingers and all.  And showed it to everyone!  Even grandma.  I was so amused and so grossest out and SO glad I wasn't pregnant when this happened! 

I think this would be labled: Things you don't share with first time parents. 

And as a fitting end to the day, just before bed last night dh got the mouse.  I'll spare you those details, but I am sure I am an evil person now for having sent a poor little mouse to its demise.  And I tell you the truth, this all happened in one day. I'm thinking my morning sickness while pregnant might be will justified.

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