Most people give what they want, some people give what they can, few give what is needed.
I want to give what is needed, I also want it to be what I want to give and I want to be able to give it. Question is: How do I know what is needed?
When we were going through Hell after the dh lost his business there were lots of things we needed. We needed food and we needed money to pay bills and we needed a job and the list went on. We were just trying to survive. Some people gave us food, some gave us cash, even some odd jobs here and there. However, what we ended up needing the most was not something anyone could give us. It was the learning experience. God was trying to teach us His ways. If someone had given us a job, a house, food, money, whatever, it could have totally derailed what God wanted us to learn. But to those who saw us suffering all that was on their minds was our immediate needs.
Likewise with my kids, I have given them all I could, but is it what they needed? How will I know? If my daughter needs to learn patience but I drop everything to answer her beck and call, perhaps I am depriving her of that learning experience. If my son needs to confidence, but I am always doing something for him, then he has not learned how to be confident in anything. And when my children need new clothes, new bike, new books to read, it would be simple to throw money at the situation but perhaps what they are learning is not to dwell on the material world so much as the spiritual.
Give what you want, give what you can, but don't be so proud to think you are giving what is truly needed. Let God take care of that.